Changes
I’ve gone through several changes over the past month and I’m unsure if they’re all good or bad. I sacrifice for my family so we all can live better but the selfish side of me wants what it wants.
I’m holding on by a thread so I won’t slip into the darkness my mind takes me to during times when I’m uncertain, or have difficult things to deal with. I don’t like that place. The best way to describe it all would be to say my thoughts seem all jumbled and it almost seems like I’m having arguments with myself in my head meanwhile asking God for forgiveness for any mean or selfish thought that crosses my mind.
Sometimes people piss me off so bad I feel rage that makes my blood boil. It’s almost like I can feel it bubble beneath my flesh. Then as quickly as it came it goes. Lucky for them.
Other times people make me happy, excited, thrilled that they are with me in that moment. I wish there were more moments like those.
There are times when I’m alone when I see a beautiful cloud, bird, field, or precious moment that reminds me how wonderful life can be.
I miss being in love. The sweet priceless kind that wraps you in warmth, and fills your nostrils with the scent of that one you hold dear.
All things happen in time and for a reason. This includes this present storm thats brewing in my head.
I’ll wait patiently because as they say..”This too shall pass.”
